I am not looking for any answers here, nor any , gee sorry bud, this is just a warning
one of those stinking *^&%^^*, **&#$, warnings, reminders
how many times have you been told to not run with a knife
or run a skill saw in the rain with the ground tab broken
or cut metal without safety glasses
or get up on a ice covered roof without a harness………………………..
Just finihsed a project for a person I have known for over 25 maybe 30 years
we used to work together , and pound brewskis. Our friendship lasted through the years
he wnet off to another line of work, maintainance at a hospital, for the bennies, I was one of his references
we watched and helped each others kids grow
we would bs like good ol boys whenever we would meet
cars, work, weather, rodeo,
helped hom buck hay when he needed, covered for him when he was late to work or hung over.
of course when it was time to build a new house who else would he call but his old bud, me sure I have done little jobs on the old place for em.
gave him breaks from day one
some days after the crew was gone we would sit and bs about the good ol days, beer was no longer part of his life so Pepsi was our drink in those “talks” in the shade of the framing
but over the years we had gone different directions, minor, but different, or so I thought
we talked about all kind of things, his new proerty wiht a view, his new car, his family and his new found religon and how a lot of his life and decisions are actually in someone elses hands now and he is just doing what he is told.
final bill time
“I dint know the changes were going to be so much” ( baloney i let him know approx.
“my wife might have wanted that but did I approve it, I pay the bills”
” I dont care if I agreed to paint and stain, and clean up at night, and I didnt and you did when I said yeah go for it, Im too busy”
get this………. ” it turned out bigger then we really need, I dont know what to do wth the space, so its more then we need or can afford” ( we added less then 200 sq feet to 1800 sq ft house + garage )
and to top it off, wit the final bill and payment, which was 9+k short he included his attornesy biz card , with a note saying to contact him if I feel I need to
( 9k on a 220k home, so we are not even looking at a 5% change, but 9k is out of my pocket)
so remember
GET IT IN WRITING !!!!!!!!!!
I dont care if its a best bud, minor thing, whatever
inital blue prints, make notes, whatever
We have all been told before
GET IT IN WRITING !!!!!!!!!!!!!
I meet my attorney thursday, but I know the answer, “you got it in writing ?”
Yeah I have the needed state Lien stuff in place from months back when we signed the contract
but changes…………..I believed in a “friends” words and dont have em in writing
so
friends , dont you just love em sometimes
ps, just won the lottery have you ? , want to help an old breaktimer out my e-mail address is………………………………………………………………………..
yeah and your sitting ther going ……….hammertime ….you fool…ya never learn
Replies
hammertime,
Thats sad, really sad. Hate it when I find out people have changed from who I remember or thought them to be.
Talk to his new found religions leader, pastor etc. I haven't heard of too many religions that encourage f***ing your friends. he might as well get a little public embarassment out of the deal. Anyway, the new friends are the ones he's proudly showing his newly refurbished house to, that he got at such a great deal.
That just sucks, I hope an equitable solution is reached
The times I have been philipsed the worst has been by people who wear their religion on their sleeves. My perception is that they are convinced that they are saved anyway... so why worry about stickin it to anybody?
Don't get me wrong... religious is fine, and I have my own deep-seated beliefs. However, every time I hear preaching.. I grab my wallet.... because it seems that every I don't... it ends up empty.
I have had a Christian customer, she announced the fact of her religion when we first met as if it was a badge of honor, tell me that she was shorting me money to donate in my name to a mission in South America 'where people are starving'. She noted that I had a house and food on the table so I should give something. She followed up with claiming that my sacrifice would gain me favor and many times the return in the future.
I agree!
You can determine the severity of an airplane fire by seeing if the crash crews race toward the fire or away from it.
some of the worst work and biggest problems have come from those people who "wear religion" as a badge and mention it early.
I avoid them. wacko somewhere.
'"we are a Christian company" sends me running.
Even though you don't have the paperwork, I still think you should file a mechanic's lien.
What a stinking shame. I've been there and it's a lousy feeling indeed. When I started my present business I had a best friend, we were literally like brothers for over ten years. He had not a dime to his name but was very talented so I proposed I would provide the start up money and he could buy his half over time. Worst mistake I ever made. The day we opened for business the friendship ended and by the time I got him to leave I was nearly ruined... I'd never mix business and friendship again.
Sad. Tough to hear it. I was nearly destroyed by a couple who did me a "favor" by finding every discrepancy in my contract and pointing them out to me during the job. "We didn't have that in writing" was heard too many times. Even didn't remember my verbal definition of allowance. This also from
I hate to hear about the friendship. I guess this shows what the friendship meant to him. Good luck. Sorry, don't have any extra $ to send!
Hammer,
I'm sorry for your loss - of innocence. You have just been completely screwed by a former 'friend'. I liked the other poster's idea of talking to his minister - he does deserve a public embarrassment at the least. I don't know about the legal aspects of it, but a verbal contract is still supposed to be binding. Having it in writing is, of course, better, because when it gets down to I said/he said you're going off who is more believable to the court. But you can't go back and get in writing what isn't there, so you need to explore the avenues you do have.
Good luck
BTW... I'd be cautious in speaking to his minister. Could be hauled in for slander (or would it libel? I forget the difference)...
Slander=Spoken
Libel=Letter
Jon Blakemore
I think that the complainant has to prove that the 'slander' was untrue.
Thanks Jon... I know they have to prove it but really, who needs the headaches? It's a painful lesson and personally I feel the sooner I move on and heal the better. As I said, I've learned the lesson and lost the friend myself, I feel for him.
I am really sorry to hear that story. Betrayal is such a terrible feeling. What a crappy lesson. Let us know the ending. It is of no value to you at this time but I hope he gets his in spades in the end, and know he will. DanT
Can you take him to small claims court? From what I know, contracts don't have to be in writing to be enforcable. Verbal agreement, while easily disputed, can still be binding. Do you think he would admit that his wife wanted the changes? Are both of their names on their checks?
Jon Blakemore
That is a shame. Have had similar troubles.
Working for friends or family for money is a very risky proposition.
On the other side of the table, NOT hiring friends or family in an effort to avoid conflicts can also cause hurt feelings. A quandary.
Sorry about what happened--it's like the probably too much talked about "loss of innocence" idea--where you feel like all those old times have just been polluted by the recent event. Anyway. I knew a guy in highschool and kept in touch, mostly with closer friends of his--I was more of a third party. The guy always bragged about being a radical, being a Marxist-Leninist, etc.. Another friend, "Jake" called me once and said we were invited to "Bill's" cottage. It's really his wife's family's, but anyway. So we went and had a good time with Bill, reminiscing about old times. A year later, Jake calls and says he's going to Bill's cottage again and why don't I go too. So I call Bill's sister, who I knew better than Bill and she asks if I need a ride there. I tell her I just want to be sure it's okay to go, and if it is, a ride would be swell. Next thing, I get a call from Bill telling me, "I don't know how to say this, but you're not invited. And don't try to go there when we're not there because the place is patrolled by private security." Well, I've been a lot of things, but never a thief or burglar or anything like that. I was offended, but ended up just saying obviously the SOB never knew me and we were never really friends. Now I see the guy is running for office as a conservative! Like Cindy Lauper saus, "Money changes everything." (Except I have my suspicions that the guy was always an SOB, just hid it well.)
We don't all get it in writing for every job. I'm also guilty of that. I do maybe 10 to 15 jobs a year, probably write a contract on 2 or 3.
So far I've never been screwed.
Friends and family however are a must. Think of it as practice
Your old buddies will say "this guys a friend, won't charge me an arm and a leg". You are going "I don't have to worry about gettin' paid here..." Problem is everyone has a different opinion about what is expected. putting it on paper will make everyones expectations the same.
If you need to tell people that you are a Christian, you're missing the point. They say it like there should be a 'Christian discount', along with the senior's.
That is so totally rotten that it sickens me. I'd woulda done the exact same thing for friend....probably still would if in the same situtation. Know what to do? You live in a "small town"?
Take out a full page add in the local newspaper explaining the situation and it's outcome. Like a public service announcement from your friendly neighborhood contractor warning against the perils of "no good deed goes unpunished".
thanks everyone
Again it was a "friend" and we always do change orders , initila blueprints etc when ever something comes up
so an old " friend" let it slide................yeah
however please dont take me wrong folks,
it seems that some of you/us are blaming his new found religion a littel harder then I am
religon or not
hes just an a-hole now
ill let you know what the lawyer says after thursday
remeber its just a reminder for all of us
cover your arse!!!
situation sucks ...
hope U get all the money ...
like someone else said ... all's not lost yet ... a written contract just helps clarify ... an unwritten contract .. is still a contract ....
But ... I wanted to tell ya this is the best title I've read yet!
Took me a minute ... what the hell .... ohhh ....
JeffBuck Construction, llc Pittsburgh,PA
Artistry in Carpentry