In a nut shell-
I am doing a job 2 hrs away and now have enough of the job closed it that I can spend the night in “my own room.” The 2hr commute each way was killing me.
Did it for the second time last night. Client came home around 11pm and was so drunk he almost couldn’t walk. BTW, he drove home.
I was floored. Didn’t think people did this any more. What do I do?
a. Nothing. It’s none of my biz/ Don’t confuse business.
b. Talk to the client. Saying what?
c. Put the client on notice.
d. Not spend the night. What I don’t see, I am not responsible for.
e. ___________________.
F.
Replies
"Didn't think people did this any more. What do I do?"
Frank,
Visit Wisconsin. I had to go into work at 2:00am (bar closing time) on a Sunday morning last year. Geez, the amount of vehicles on the back country roads all over the place was unbelievable. Must have seen 20 drunk drivers out of 19 cars LOL. Got to the interstate.....None.
I wouldn't say a word to him if you still want to keep working for him. More common than you think. I know plenty of people, cops and firemen even, who actually drink WHILE driving.
Jon
So what's more important, a persons life, maybe the life of an innocent 2yr old, than to make a buck for your own family, who might some day be killed by a drunk driver because someone else had a "look the other way because they wanted more work" attitude? I'll bet it if happened to you that you lost y our wife, or child, or even your own life, you'd have wished the person who saw this didn't look the other way and valued life enough to call the police. Surely you have the wherewithall to realize the lives this man puts in jeopardy.
BTW, drinking and driving drunk is never a mistake, it's foolishness.
"drinking and driving drunk is never a mistake, it's foolishness."
Pyro,
(interesting handle?) I never advocated driving while intoxicated, just pointed out it's more common than some think depending on where you live.
Also, I did a little research on accident rates of teens and drunks, and found that sober teens were more likely to be involved in a fatal crash (based on miles driven) than a drunk male ( 0.08 - 0.10 BAL,) between age 30 and 50. So assuming this to be true, who is more of a menace?
Granted driving while impaired is a choice, and teens can't help being teens, but then there is the whole driving with a cell phone in hand thing, old people with slow reflexes driving thing, all of which IMO are equally as bad. Oh, and lets not for get the people going the speed limit in the left lane as they are being passed on the right by like they are standing still, and causing elevated levels of road rage, which also causes quite a few accidents.
Jon
Edited 6/30/2004 6:45 pm ET by WorkshopJon
That's a tough one.
If it's just the one time, I'd say forget it. Everybody makes a mistake.
If it happens again...then you got a real problem.
Regards,
Tim Ruttan
Tough situation.
I'd go for "D" - Not staying there anymore.
I've tried telling people that drinking and driving weren't a good idea. Most of the ones who still do it seem to think it's cute or funny. I've had some tell me they've practiced enough that they feel like they're good at it now.
.
If the client asks why you're not staying there anymore, that might force a situation where you'd have to come clean with him.
This weekend 1,000 people lined up at Barnes and Noble to see Bill Clinton. Not to buy his book, but to give him a Father's Day card. [Craig Kilborn]
You need to do something!!!! This guy is a danger. He was so drunk he could barely walk???!! And he's driving!! Who's he gonna hit and hurt, or kill, on his next drive home from the bar?
Call the local police and tell them your story. Let them take it from there. You dont need to get directly involved, but you do need to do something.
-m2akita
I think I would contact the local police. I would simply say that on such and such a date I observed this particular person drive this particular vehicle while he was seriously intoxicated.
Depending upon local priorities (and the political standing of the individual you're reporting), the police may put some effort into keeping an eye out for a repeat performance.
Rich Beckman
Another day, another tool.
Wow, that's a tough one!
Yes people do still do it. Here in Minnesota, today's paper featured a story of a man who was just arrested for his 23rd DWI!!!
Clearly you are a man with a conscience and don't want to see someone injured or killed because of this guy. If you turn a blind eye, that could happen. To be true to yourself, you need to say something. Do it when he's sober (and not hung over). Be matter-of-fact about it, and just tell him how you feel and that you can't stand by and watch someone place himself and others at risk like that.
There are several possible outcomes:
1. This was just the wakeup call he needed and he mends his ways, thanking you profusely for turning his life around.
2. He says it's none of your business, but if it bothers you that much he won't do it again until the job is completed.
3. He tells you if it bothers you that much, don't stay there. Then you won't see it happen.
4. He tells you to mind your own business.
5. He gets angry and fires you.
If 1 or 5 happens, the matter is pretty well settled. If 2 happens, there's nothing more you can do. He's making a concession, but you can't expect him to swear off DWI forever just for you. If 3 or 4 happens, you need to decide which is more important to you; the job or your moral code. If you do cut the guy loose, that may send a strong enough message to him to mend his ways.
Don't know if you're a religious man, but prayer (and listening/watching for answers) can be VERY helpful in situations like this.
Do you really want to work for a murderer? When he kills somebody on the road won't you feel like an accessory, that just by saying something you could have saved the lives of that entire family? Is whatever money you are making worth somebody's life? For me (a) and (d) would be unacceptable. You've already seen the behavior and a person who will do something once will do it twice. People seem to forget that at a certain stage of drunk there is no judgement. If he hasn't made other arrangements before starting to drink, he's PLANNING to drive himself home. So it's really a question of do you want to deal with him directly or do you want to contact the police? If he's a friend as well as client then you should sit him down and give him the hard facts. If he was drinking at a bar that he frequents regularly, contact the bar. They are legally liable if he drives away intoxicated and they will take steps to prevent it happening again. If none of these is feasible, contact the police. You must do something.
Tough call for sure.
There are too many scenarios to play out as to what you can or should do. Follow your conscience, balance that with the reality of getting paid.
Last ditch effort, you could always call the cops anonomously and make them aware of what you witnessed. Maybe they can keep an extra eye out, maybe not.
One other thought - remember that folks that drive drunk are a danger to us all. I know from personal experience as my wife's son was killed by a drunk driver at the age of eight. You clearly don't take this lightly given that you've raised the issue here in the Tavern. That certainly is a start.
1. In making an anonomous call to the cops I'll have to state where I saw the driver driving and why I thought he was intoxocated. However I don't know what bar he was coming from and therefore the route he took home. Even if I stated that I saw him on his street, which direction was he going?
2. I am not the world's keeper. I can barely take care of myself. But it's not like me to not get involved. I pull over on the thruway to help stranded motorists, I have helped foil crimes in progress, etc. Where does my role as sheperd begin and/ or end? I'm working on that.
3. I am going to do something. It's really an issue of timing, tact and means.
4. But what control do I really have over this guy? By not spending the night I am not having any discouraging effect (on him). A "talk" will only soothe my concience.
5. Are we responsible for ourselves or each other? I am not referring to a "perfect world." Let's stay grounded in reality.
6. Ugh, I hate this!
F.
1. You're right. Calling the cops after the fact or even as a "heads up" is useless. That's why I didn't mention it in my first response.
2. IMHO, our "roles as shepherds" depend on what we are capable of doing. We are called upon to help one another to the best of our ability. That doesn't necessarily mean we chuck all our worldly goods and join the Peace Corps, but I would say this situation falls into the manageable category.
3. Excellent!
4. You have absolutely no control over this guy, but you can have an influence. The degree of that influence will depend partly upon your actions and partly upon his receptiveness. Not spending the night with no explanation will have no effect. Having a talk with him might have an effect. Backing it up with actions if need be is even more likely to have an effect. And even if you have no effect, if you know you've done the right thing, it's more than just a salve for your conscience - it's one more step in your own growth.
5. See #2.
6. I don't blame you!
Dave
"Calling the cops after the fact or even as a "heads up" is useless."
This cannot be stated with certainty. It is completely dependent on what jurisdiction the client lives in.
No, you don't know where he was or what direction he was driving, but you know his name, his address, what kind of car, what day of week and what time of day.
Maybe calling the cops is useless, but it might not be, and it should only take a few minutes.
Rich Beckman
Another day, another tool.
Is there a MADD chapter in your area ? These folks generally have deep contacts into the police dept and maybe they can help to xmit the info and still keep you at arm's length..
Phill Giles
The Unionville Woodwright
Unionville, Ontario
Confession here -- I have driven drunk when young, dumb and I assume God still had a purpose for me (someone was looking after me). About 5 years ago I was hit by a drunk driver - got luck only a totaled car - it was a hit and run the cops later caught the guy and the legal system slapped his wrist (that really pissed me off). After being on both sides of that coin - don't stay - run far away - check his car or damage (like a little yellow dress, with pink ruffles), call the cops (maybe he can get his wrist slapped too). How much are you making on this job - how many little yellow dresses can you buy with that. Will enough little yellow dresses bring her back.
Enough with the drama!
I am NOT asking how to feel and when. I am asking for approach. level of responsibilty FOR OTHERS, and for options I may not have considered. Let's keep the discussion to that.
F.
I have been the driver like that.
Now. I would wait till the AM..calmly ask how he felt (Man ya must have a dinger of a hangover huh? ) and then, ease into the observence you made..and maybe say something like.." ya know if ya get caught you will be out of a DL, possible jail time, and $$$$$...and that's the GOOD outcome..the bad is ya kill someone..or yourself.
I don't think callin the 5/0 is gonna do anything..you might as well go out drinkin with him and be his DD..?Or call a cab.
lead by example..
My DUI was for refusing the test..5 yrs. no DL, 30 days in co. ( 60 cuz I did work release) and about 2500.00..now, I am greatful that I don't have to live with the knowing that I killed someone..I was IN with a guy who did just that..( all of you in western NC know of Wendell Perkins..) his truck careened into a sports van on a mountain hiway..killed 2 or 3 ..one was a HS girl,another was the coach..he got 22 yrs. And the rest of his life is trashed..his mind was already gone, before he ever went to trial.
But by the grace of God..there go I
be diplomatic, but not silent
Spheramid Enterprises Architectural Woodworks
Repairs, Remodeling, Restorations.
This is not meant in a negative way; however, you could consider minding your own business. You are in that person's home. If you feel a manifest destiny to get drunks off the road, you can join a number of groups, join the police force, or just wait outside any bar and call them in on your cell phone as they stumble to their cars. Thus you would be doing something positive in a systematic way, rather than forcing your morality crisis on this person who you came across randomly. Either way, you should not work for a person you have judged and do not respect.
I'm with you, enough with the drama! Opinions are like a-holes, right?
I fail to see how this is a "tough one" at all. Rich is absolutely right. Call the cops! I'm willing to bet that when this ba$tard kills someone, you'll know then exactly what you should have done.
Ken
Never underestimate your ability to overestimate your ability
You're right, too much drama! You asked a simple question and we all give boo and tears.
In all seriousness my advice is d. don't spend the night, what you don't see you are not responsible for.
You will need to ask the legal eagles around here, but I think that is by far the most reliable defense. As a witness at some later date (hopefull his H&R trial will be many years from now, and living two hours from you hope will not involve anyone that you know) a prosecuting attoney would be making a pretty strong stretch to fine you culpable for his actions. Besides, chances are the barkeep (and his employer) probably have much deeper pockets to go after.
a. Nothing. It's none of my biz/ Don't confuse business.
you're right none of you biz - but a jury may see you as standing back and waiting for a train wreck - just for the thrill of it.
b. Talk to the client. Saying what?
and interfer with his lifestyle, you could piss him off and loose a good client (2 hour drive- must be a good client right)
c. Put the client on notice.
notice for what? a spanking.
d. Not spend the night. What I don't see, I am not responsible for.
correct answer.
see my earlier post -- my halo has plenty of dents-- Lord knows I'm the last to be throwing stones in my glass house,
Is cliché mixing allowed?
Tough spot to be in.
If I were in your shoes, I'd take a deep breath and talk with the guy frankly about your concern as respectfully as possibly, without being accusatory or judgemental, and knowing full well that he may tell you to go screw yourself.
You probably have to accept that this may do absolutely nothing to change his behavior. If he's an alcoholic, it almost surely won't--he needs help. Do you know if he has any family in the area? It may seem meddlesome, but the best bet to change the situation might be to alert somebody who cares about him and has some bond.
At this point I really don't see the point of alerting the police--unless it's a small town where they know the guy and can keep an eye out for him, maybe talk with him, the cops aren't going to be able to do much unless they nail him driving home (and even then he could easily be back behind the wheel).
Follow your gut on this one, and just realize that you're not in a good position to change the situation--but you can at least try.
so what's next?
what if ya over hear the husband setting a date with his secretery?
arrange marriage counseling ...
he's your client .. not your kid. Work faster and get out quicker.
calling the cops ... no matter where you live .... will be completely and totally useless ... even if they lie to ya over the phone and saw they'll look into it ....
exactly what would you say to the guy that he doesn't already know?
You're not a cop .. you're not a drug/alchol counselor .... I'd say there's pretty much nothing you can do. Talk to the guy if it makes you feel better ... but I'd be prepared to not be invited back.
There is nothing you can do to make a difference .. aside from taking the guys keys.
Really .. what are the chances he's an alcoholic that's really trying to clean himself up .... and he's really hoping that the carpenter is there waiting for him at home to talk him into reality and turn his life around?
Jeff
Buck Construction, llc Pittsburgh,PA
Artistry in Carpentry
It's real simple. You have knowledge of a dangerous drunk on the streets, ready to kill an innocent. How could you live with yourself if you didn't turn him in?
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming....
WOW!!! What a Ride!
Edited 6/25/2004 5:40 pm ET by IMERC
Frankie,
So how about this--tell the guy that if he's in that situation again, while you're staying at his house, to call you and you'll come and pick him up. And the next morning, you drive him to his car. After all, if you're out of town and staying at his place, what else have you got to do at 11 PM?
If he takes you up on the offer, the drive to the car the next morning ought to give you some quality time together. He might thank you, and that could give you an opening to play on his conscience about the danger of driving drunk.
Good luck. If he rolls in drunk again under his own power, or takes you up on it but seems to have no second thoughts about driving drunk, then finish up the job, and collect your payment. Then maybe send him an article from the local paper about a drunk driver who killed him/herself or someone else, or both. Assuming that it isn't your client.
Good luck,
Cliff
Ok, leave out all the boo hoo's and drama.
As Imerc said, it is still real simple. You know of someone who is a danger to the public. Possibly lethal the next time he drives home from the bar.
It's up to you. Leave it alone, and hope that no one gets hurt, or do something about it.
Why did you get involved in anything else you have gotten involved in ? You weren't a cop, or a babysitter, or a counsellor then, either. It was none of your business...
Conscience ? You have no conscience now ? Does money negate a conscience ?
Who cares, wins.
so go right on ahead, Luka ...
go and call the cops right after you wintess someone walking thru their front door ...
drunk out of their mind ... after you know they just drove home.
Go right on ahead and call the cops ...
to report .....
exactly what are we gonna report?
Just what do ya think the cops are gonna say?
But hey ... go ahead ... it'll make ya feel better ...
and that's pretty much the end of it.
'cause nothing else is gonna happen.
sorry to report the truth .... guess it doesn't make anyone feel as good, huh?
Jeff
Buck Construction, llc Pittsburgh,PA
Artistry in Carpentry
Jeff,
You seem to be concentrating on whether anything can be done about the situation he saw.
I agree with you: at this point, trying to get anything done about that past event is almost certain to be fuitle.
Do you think there is anything he can or could or should do to try to prevent future drunk driving episodes by his customer?
I like Cap's suggestion, myself.
.
.
.
"It is as hard for the good to suspect evil, as it is for the bad to suspect good."
-- Marcus Tullius Cicero, statesman, orator, writer (106-43 BCE)
Edited 6/27/2004 12:38 pm ET by Bob Walker
Frankie,
Try this approach: Monday, ask him how his weekend was. After he tells you, he will ask how your's was. If he doesn't, offer how your weekend was. Tell him it sucked, because you had a problem turning over and over in your mind all weekend long. It's a problem that may affect the work on his house. This should get his attention. Explain to him that you are not used to seeing anybody drive drunk, and it has really affected you.
Let the discussion flow from there. Approach it not as his problem, but as your problem dealing with it. (Save the lecture about his problem, it will not affect him). Maybe ask him for any suggestions, about how to deal with it. If he is an occational drinker, he will be embarassed and probably take it easy the rest of the time you are there. If he truly has a problem, he may fire you, or tell you to MYOB.
Whatever the outcome you will not change this person. At best you will plant the seeds of change, at worst you will drive him to drink harder and more often. ( This I tell you from my past personal experience)
Workshop Jon is right. You should try Wisconsin. I have heard it said that we have the highest ratio of drunks to population in the nation. I had one client that I built an addition for, and Wednesday was golf day for him. He usually came home pretty well in the bag at 5:00 PM. Another example? A few weeks ago I was speaking to a deputy about my expired plates, at 10:30 AM, and he had already booked one DUI that morning already. One more? Heard from a sub-contractor about a client that got busted DUI, and a week later had coffee and a shot of Capt Morgan's for breakfast.
Good Luck with your client.
Bowz
Well, when there is just about a bar on every corner its not surprising about WI. When I moved to Virginia (basically a dry state when compared to Wisconsin), it took me while to get used to not seeing bars every where.
-m2akita
"Well, when there is just about a bar on every corner its not surprising about WI."
M2,
...And in West Allis, it's more like four to a corner. (every corner of a corner) plus a few in between for good measure. Interesting how Wisconsin also has some of the lowest auto insurance rates in the nation, and a relatively low reported accident rate/driven mile, yet one of the highest percentages of drunks on the road. Something like 1/3 to 2/3's I've heard during certain hours and days.
Something to ponder.
Jon
Do you think there is anything he can or could or should do to try to prevent future drunk driving episodes by his customer?
There's always a chance .... for most anything to happen. I'd never say 100% that the cops wouldn't do anything either ... this toem may be Mayberry ... and the one cop on duty might have nothing better that to look for the town drunks car ...
But I'd say real world odds are way against it.
I've heard of "interventions" going bad when the drunk in question was calling out for attention/help .... I'm not a a betting man ... but I'd bet the farm that no good would come from telling a customer that you want them to stop drinking and driving.
Others have said ... if he really feels he "has to" step in and "do something" .... that mentioned "Hey, ya really tied one on last night" .... or ... "buddy, I'm sleeping on the couch .. just call and I'll pick ya up" ... would probably be the least intrusive route to go.
The problem I see here ... if the guy is the professional drunk driver everyones made him out to be .... the less effective any of the "take him off the road" ideas are gonna work. Real drunks are a pretty determined bunch ... and usually without them even knowing it.
JeffBuck Construction, llc Pittsburgh,PA
Artistry in Carpentry
Again, I kind of like Cap's idea - offer to pick him up if there's a next time.
We know nothing about this guy - is he an habitual drunk driver, or did he make a mistake this time?
The friendly offer might make him aware that his escapade was noticed, and if he isn't a habitual drunk, maybe it'll be the little nudge he'll remember next time he's in a similar situation.
If he is a hardcore drunk driver, you're right, anything he does is pretty unlikely to accomplish anything.
But if he can plant a seed, why not give it a shot?
"It is as hard for the good to suspect evil, as it is for the bad to suspect good."
-- Marcus Tullius Cicero, statesman, orator, writer (106-43 BCE)
Spent the weekend away. Thought about it while driving, a lot. One major difficulty is, I see all your points.
I kinda side with JJ Buck. I am not responsible for others, should mind my own biz, and the client prob won't listen anyway.
But then, as others have stated, too numerous to account, what if this guy kills someone, it's a safety issue, there are laws about this....... Seems there is a fine line between responsibility and good ol' fashion guilt.
THE FACTS
I. I know the guy likes to drink.
II. I only saw him come home drunk, once. He drove home that time.
III. I have seen him drink at home, but haven't seen him get drunk.
IV. When I come to the site in the morning the garbage can is full of empty beer cans.
V. I am NOT the client's mother/ guardian/ keeper.
IV. I an not the police/ secret agent man/ The Shadow.
For the short term, barring any further "incident", I am going to contact a local chapter of MADD for informational purposes only. I am certain they have come across this situation before and have a certain protocol.
One thing I failed to mention, though during the weekend analysis I realized, is that as contractors , working in someone's home, we (I) try to be invisible. It is part of the unwritten code of renovation. We are in client's home, not on job-sites. (Not bragging) I have worked in some very high-profile peoples homes and part of what I bring to the table is that though I see them when they first wake up and when they are preparing for bed, on their good days and bad, with and without make-up, none of this is for public consumption. Their lives are private and no one elses biz. I respect their privacy and they (hopefully) respect my methods and direction of my workers and subs.
In this clients case though I will be crossing that line of "invisibility". Not something I am prone to do.
Thank you all for the input.
F.
Edited 6/28/2004 6:53 pm ET by Frankie
frankie,
Thanks for doing something.
"Somefine line between responsibility and good ol' fashion guilt" well put,
for whatever reason I'm glad you are doing something. - it's easy to stand tall and be preachy when it is coming through a keyboard.
A. First, you work for him, which doesn't put you in the power position here. So what happens if you bring it up? Well, you planted a seed. The average alcoholic will tell you that they probably had a hundred warnings before they did something. Who is to say if you are warning #1 or #100? * You can say something if you feel compelled to, but at least be aware from the start that it probably has less than a 1 in 100 chance of accomplishing what you want. Also be aware that it could have a significant effect on your remaining on the job site. Alky's do not like people who interfere with their drinking. I'd sooner get between a grizzley and her cub. As I said right from the beginning, you work for him. If he were your employee, then you could hold a good bargaining chip like "his job" to increase the odds something was done. But in this case, you are the employee. I suppose there are cases where an employee got a boss to stop drinking, but I can't think of one offhand, and I've heard alot of stories. If it does turn out to be a chronic issue which bugs you, then go to alanon. It won't help him but at least it won't bother you so much when you learn what is and what isn't in your power.
B. Hmmm, what would I do? First, I'd park my vehicle in a place where he can't hit it. Second, does he smoke? If yes, I'd make sure there were functional smoke detectors between him and you. If you feel compelled to say something, be ready to accept the fact that that it likely won't accomplish anything. Keep in mind that many alcoholics don't stop drinking after their 5th DWI. Whatever you say, just make sure it is consistent with how you feel. And also remember that coming home polluted once and coming home polluted every night are two different scenarios. You described two incidents to us, not a pattern of behavior. For someone with a pattern, my approach is simple. I tell them, "when you feel like stopping drinking, here's my number, call me 24/7." And then I don't bring it up again. I did this with a guy 5 years ago. Since then, he has gotten 3 DWI's and has lost his license for 4 years. He still hasn't told me he has lost his license, and until he does, I know he isn't ready to stop. There is alot of truth to the old saying that getting someone to stop drinking is like trying to teach tricks to a pig. All it does is make you frustrated, and it annoys the pig. If I had a magical answer as to what to say to someone to get them to stop drinking, well, I'd be living in one of the McMansions all you guys are b1tchin about.
C. See above. He is the boss. I'd place odds that you'd be looking for other work before he does anything to alter his behavior. Maybe wait until the job is over and you have been paid before you say something. By then you will have more data points, and will also know whether or not you need his work. Quite frankly, if it were an issue of you not getting paid on a regular basis, or him not being available for consultation because he was hungover, then I'd say you had cause for a confrontation. But in the absence of any negative impact on your life other than "it makes you uncomfortable," I'd say a confrontation is uncalled for.
D. You aren't responsible for anything here. Sure, it makes you uncomfortable, but there is no legal obligation on your part to report him. I'd say you are more likely to be at risk for slander or libel if you call the police and report him, and then they pull him over and he hasn't been drinking. If it were me, I'd stay there. Why should you risk your life driving back and forth every day? Go about your life and let him go about his. Your being there or not being there will likely have no effect on his life, but it will have a dramatic effect on your life.
* Only one in five people who need AA ever make it to a meeting. Of them, one in five stay a year.
Frankie
Its coming on to July 4th.
The day Katrina's (my DW) brother was killed coming home from college in Florida many years ago.
Killed by a drunk driver.
Its made Katrina too scared to allow others to drive while she's in the car. she needs to be in control of the vehicle for that reason.
I can't remember the last time I drove with her in the car.
I just respect her fears and paranoia's and let her do all the driving.
Actually I kinda dig it...lol....being chauffered.
Not only did it kill her brother but had a serious effect on her.
Not looking forward to July 4th anymore because I know what it represents to her.
Personally I don't like calling the man on anyone but in this instance I think its your duty to make them aware.
Silence can be a killer!
BE well aware
andy
The secret of Zen in two words is, "Not always so"!
http://CLIFFORDRENOVATIONS.COM
Frankie, I've been thinking about your dilemma since you first posted it. Yeah, there were no replies the first time I read it.
I have some experience with alkies. In fact I suffer from a fatal attraction to them. It is so bad, that if I find myself really liking someone I just met, I suspect them of being an alkie till proven otherwise. Now I avoid them like the plague.
Is your client an alcoholic? Don't know. You have only seen him drunk once in your life, right? Does he have a bar full of half empty bottles? are there other signs around the house? I don't know, but you do.
I had a sub who was just as dangerous, but in a different way. I fired him on the spot at the first incident, but, I had less at stake.
Trying to put myself in your situation. . .
I'ld say, forgive this incident, do nothing and say nothing, but don't forget it.
Are you prepared for the worst that can happen to you if you do anything?
The next time it happened, I would tell him, without anger, "You are a menace to the public, and for my own safety, I won't be around you. I'll mail you a bill for 'work performed' in the morning and I expect you to pay it immediately." Then I would pack up and drive home to my own bed and start the next job in the morning. After sending him the bill.
I prayed that you find a solution that fits you.
Samt
well said
Spheramid Enterprises Architectural Woodworks
Repairs, Remodeling, Restorations.
In the world of drug and alcohol and alcohol treatment, they call it intervention. Short of of a self or spiritual induced epiphany, it"s the only thing that can work to modify the behavior of a substance abuser, be they chronic/and or addicted or once a month bingers. Intervention can be performed by close family members, law enforcement personnel, clergy, would-be Carrie Nations or anyone concerned enough to do it; however I don't suspect the success ratio in general is known.
If you feel compelled to perform your civic and moral duty, how about a carefully thought out, anonymous note/letter. It could, of course, simply interject an element of paranoia into this already poorly behaving client, but it would also be available for rereading and, possibly, contemplation. And it might also be less likely to be misunderstood, as is often the case with one-time verbal communications.
At any rate, your duty would be done and your conscience would be cleared, seeing as these are pretty much the same. You need absolution of a kind.
I dont know why some of the guys say its a tough call, as long as I see somthing i see affects me then its my business. call the police. let them know the potential life threatening disaster. if they feel its there business and I think they will. they might keep an eye on him / watch for there car or go have a talk with him.
If you dont want to do this while you are still working hurry before he kills somone and goes to jail and has no money to pay you or worse yet kills someone and himself and cant pay you because the job would end .
now I do want to say you sound like a person that does the right thing when you can or you wouldnt post this. you just need support in doing what you think is right.
dogboy
How come you guys are so opinionated on a post that has supplied so little data about the question: What do I do?
You really need more factual information to form some of these aggressive attitudes.
What we know is the guy drove home drunk once. Now he's an alcoholic and needs AA. We should have the cops know now days later that the guy drove home drunk.
And at 11PM to boot. Holy cow! A late nite boozer! Bet he also toots crank and lines coke when no one's around. So what's an alcoholic doing coming home at 11PM anyhow? Hmmmm, that's too early. Must be something else more degrading going on behind the scenes.
Maybe he's got kiddie porn on his puter. Ya, I bet that's it. Maybe we should check on that. Wait, we can't touch it. Let's call the police.
OK, all kidding aside, this thread just touches you'alls raw nerve because we have all had or seen people that have been swayed to the dark side of alcohol and know how life killing it can be to that individual and to others.
It's a typical pile on thread without sufficient details to form the opinions some of you have portrayed.
By the way, if I see a drunk in a car swerving all over the road I make sure the police know about it.
Be a pile