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We’ve all been there, at least I have. If it were me I would do a step in at both ends and use all my talent and inginuity to make it a part of the design. I would also tell the truth when they return. They may be mad as hell but they SHOULD respect your honesty.
With my sympathy…. SteveM
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Replies
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Is it possible to split the difference you are short to each side of the fireplace? Know how you feel ..... drove off with my block plane on the car ....... fell off a mile down the road ..... ....yeah, it was Monday.
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I vote for returns...Seems like an easy answer that would require no explanation, because it is a good detail.
Returning to near the stream,
J
*I agree. Rip the sucker to get material if you have to.
*Resaw and long scarf joint. Slide the two pieces along the scarf until you have the proper length. This is an old trick made necessary by others that have blundered in like manner as you.
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If none of the other suggestions will work, and you really want to make a lot of extra work, you could saw the blank into boards and join two successive pieces end to end, like a lengthwise book match. Put this joint in the center of the top and the grain would mirror image on either side of it. Using the same idea you would then build a skirt of material to achieve the desired thickness, with some moldings or mulitiple steps if desired. Internal structural parts could be common lumber. There is always a way!
*Fedex it to me with a check for $2,000 and I'll send it back to you the next day, good as new. Throw in one of those new 12 oz titanium hammers and I won't bill you for the return shipping.
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Would someone explain in a little more detail what this scarf joint/extendo board idea is?
Pete Draganic
*PeteIt's wacko, but it goes like this. . . Resaw the board (thickness) into two thinner boards, shape a long scarf (taper) on one end of each, put the two boards together like two nestled wedges, and pull two ends away until desired length is acheived. . . one f*ck of a lot of waste and screwing around for b ONE INCH!!!I'll third the motion for returns!!!
*I've heard the skill of a carpenter is measured by how well he covers up his mistakes..........Best of luck, RJT
*Another vote for returns. But patricks idea of a break in the middle has a lot of merit too if it would enhance the design. I've seen guys get out of that situation a couple of times that way. Good luck
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What are the current dimensions of the piece you now have cut? How about a list, too, of all your scrap/cutoffs measurements from this wood..... maybe we can help put your puzzle together? Also, what is the grain (texture/pattern/contrast) like? Dark or light wood?
mr greenjeans
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Why is two guys doing a one man's job?
Don't ever let an assistant hold the end of your tape!
This calls for the master boogerer's approach. You've already been given some vey good advice. You either have to create someend treatments that will enhance the style, or split it in the middle somewhere. I think I'd be leaning toward the wrap around treatment. But a central key would be interesting too.
Cap and route the ends, and then bitch at the people for not providing enough material! Putting them on the defensive is always a good offense!
Oh yeah, burn all the scraps (evidence).
Blue
*And the Number One answer on the top ten list is:Returns.What is the wood by the by?
*... and eat the ashes?
*May I humbly suggest that you assess the sanity of your clients and, if they are not the hatchet-throwing type, give them a list of options to pick from? I like the idea of returns or a center piece from complimentary wood. If I were the homeowner, I would detect the fakery and be more upset than if told the truth in the first place...You, um, might want to offer a break on the labor too. When will they come up with a tape measure than has zero start at the 1" mark?
*The question is which one of you was running the "smart" end of the tape?-Rob
*Worked on a job once where a "master" carpenter cut off 15 oak doors for retail stores at 6' even. The helper even tried to stop him.His fix was to tell the boss he needed to get paid so's he could get to Indiana for an operation he needed, right away.Might work...unless you already live in Indiana.
*You'd probably criticize me for attempting to toenail those doors back together, just like new! It only takes a few spikes, properly angled in each edge! the only problem I can forsee is splitting. But what do you expect if your using oak?Blue
*Have the board cut into veneer. Make a beautiful book matched mantle with it.
*A guy I used to work with (before my time) was precutting casing for a big commercial millwork job.Did 1000 left pieces instead of 500 left, 500 right. Can't remember what they said they did to get out of it. He was still there when I went to work in that shop though, so the bosses forgave him.
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This won't help solve your problem, but might save some grief later on. 'Burn' ten inches on your measurement instead of one inch. Much less confusion in the numbers and you won't make a ten inch mistake. ( If you do make a ten inch mistake, grab a dull rusty chisel and do the 'Honorable Thing'.)
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How about cuting it in half the hardest way, then joining it in the middle, and calling it "bookmatched grain". Makes the best of a bad situation, and adds value.
For example, say the fireplace is 5'-0" long and your board is a 2" thick x 5" wide x 4'-11" long for simplicity. You'd somehow cut the board into two pieces 15/16" thick x 5" wide x 4'-11" long.
Put the boards end to end such that the grain is bookmatched, and cut each piece to 2'-6" long or so for a total of 5'-0" long or so. You have a lot of length to work with now, so you can pick where the pattern mirrors the best. Might have to use plywood or blocking behind the center joint (or Norm's famous biscuits) to reinforce it. Use the leftover scrap for trim or to give it extra apparent thickness if needed.
Whether this works depends on the thickness of the slab, and whether you have the tools to rip a board this way and finish it properly etc.
Just an idea, I'm not a finish carpenter (it's been proven).
*Ok, so, RJT, with all these suggestions, what did you do? You sure know how to get a rise out of these guys!!Cheers,Scott.
*agreed, have been burning 10 instead of 1 for awhile now, you still have to ask "what're you burnin'?" every time though
*I forgot he had that great piece of 1" too long scrap to work with. Tell the owners you thought it would be a shame to throw it away, and who wants a boring flat mantle?You still have a week-and-a-half.
*You bet I'd criticize you for only attemtpting. But if you pulled it off, you're in my f***up fixing hall of fame.I did have to fix them. Super super glue. Arrrh arrrrh arrhhh.
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Hey Gary, excellent idea! Sounds familiar though. Check out post #10 above. I wonder what he ended up doing?
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Oops!
*This was a slab of wood 3 inches in height, 7 inches in depth as it sits over the fireplace. First I cut a very thin piece off the top, 7"x length, next I cut a large arc from nothing to 7 to nothing, recut a thin piece of veneer from one of those pieces, glued the two pieces together, glued the offal back on and trimmed it to the correct length and "unbent" the arched veneer and glued it to the face of the slab. Lastly I glued the 7"xL veneer piece to the top to cover the butt joint of the 1" offal and feathered in the other end where it fell short.
*. . . pardon??
*Got it. What was the wood RJT?
*sorry Patrick, the governor isn't offering pardon. He says you got to stay up there until you get that stuff out of your mustache.
*b b,f+sY.B.That g*d* stuff is some sticky, might be awhile yet, do I have to have it cleaned up before the beer/slap fest?? Are all you friggin Yankers so bureaucratic???Hey Adrian, do Lee Valley Tools sell i seal jism remover???
*If you HAVE seal jism, why would you want to remove it?
*Because of this Young Bob 4/14/99 10:59am and it's gettin a little late in the season to be tellin folks I just got some frost on my 'stache.By the dried up road near the unfrozen lake watchin the robbins cavort
*It's called a lumber stretcher. The board stretcher is just for entertainment purposes...far to light weight for this task.
*Patrick - that's the best laugh I've had since I read Blues answer to "Hebel blocks", thanks man.
*How 'bout burning zero?Blue
*worked on the layout crew for a mall once and the super warned that any of us caught "burning" anything (10 ft was the standard burn there) would be going down the road mumbling to ourselves that very day. He said he would live with the 1/8"-1/4' discrepancies here and there, but the 10' mistake was intolerable. I see his point for dirt work, but I just never have been able to keep the end of my tape flat, or break the habit.
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Here ya go...sure fire solution...
In my neck of the woods..we have these fellas..we call..grainers...they can match any grain you got...
Do up the fireplace..in some fine...poplar assembly..right dimensions...put together perfectly...have the grainer..come out..and match the piece of wood..the client boought...
Then...start your first fire..in the fireplace...using that bad wood...which somehow..allowed itself to be cut short...
Works for me....!!!....
DN
*There is a place called exotic wood in Sicklerville New Jersey. I just hate that magic inch
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They gave me a piece of wood from their foreign trip, nothing else like it anywhere in the world. I am to make a mantel piece with it. Assistant held the tape to the 1" and as a result it was cut 1" to short. They are coming back in 2 weeks. I cannot rebuild the fireplace to make it 1" narrower. How can I make the piece of wood 1" longer/appear longer?
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Joseph FuscoView Image
*Try using a board stretcher.
*We've all been there, at least I have. If it were me I would do a step in at both ends and use all my talent and inginuity to make it a part of the design. I would also tell the truth when they return. They may be mad as hell but they SHOULD respect your honesty.With my sympathy.... SteveM
*Rj,I don't know your exact situation but off the top of my head I have a few suggestions that may help or get the creative juices flowing to get you out of this mess.Some times you can cut a really long scarf joint either on a bevel or a mitre , glue it up and re-dimension it along the proper side. For example if the board is in the rough and you cut a really steep bevel across the board, glue it up while offsetting the pieces to make it longer, then surface to final thickness. You could cut the scarf on the mitre and then rerip to width if there is extra in that dimension. You may also be able to rip of some width and add a return nosing on the ends but I think you would have to show a little end grain.If there simply is not any surface area to be gained as is you may try splicing in an accent or something. Bottom line is you got to get creative or suck it up and tell the owner and run some options by them. We all make mistakes, its how you correct them that counts.I gotta put out a call to the blue eyed devil and see if he has any good boogerin idears for this one. Efficient one that he is, he would probably already have the pine hangin' off this mantle to complicate matters further. Hey Blue, you reading this?Tom
*(a) Put a mitered return on each end to "hide the end grain"(b) Take a quick trip to that foriegn land and pick up another chunk of that wood Good Luck
*RJTSteve's approach is do-able. . . not knowing what the design is you might also consider cutting your top in half and inserting a design detail like a dovetail i keyor a craftsman era 'bracket or corbel' which could be 'proud' of the front and proud of the top by a small amount, depending on the i massof the overall design, using a complimentry wood.Good luck-Patrick