A few years ago, I was putting the finishing touches on a cute presold spec house I built with help from my real-estate agent brother, Tim. As a partner, he was particular about the fit and finish of our first project together, and he would routinely walk through the house and point out whatever he perceived to be something that could be better. Having grown up with him, I was used to this kind of attention to detail, so I was not surprised when he breezed in one afternoon while I was daubing putty on the base molding.

“I noticed something that needs your attention,” he said as he strolled over to the middle of the still-uncarpeted living-room floor and began pacing back and forth. Each step produced a noticeably annoying squeak and a look of pronounced puzzlement from my poor brother. I was annoyed, too, because I was under the gun to finish the place before the week was out. I continued what I was doing and said to him, “That’s kind of weird. Those are engineered floor joists under there. They’re not supposed to squeak.”

When Tim began his “We can’t sell this house if …” rant, I interrupted him.

“Don’t worry,” I said to my brother. “I’ll just run some screws into the joists when I’m through here.”

Tim seemed satisfied with this solution and left to see about some other business. It wasn’t until the next morning that I remembered the squeaky floor, so on my way to the job site, I stopped to pick up some 2-in. square-drive screws and some fresh drive tips.

I walked into the house to where the approximate location of Tim’s squeaks were, and I could hear nothing. I walked the entire floor area from the bedrooms to the pantry, and the floor was as solid as it should have been. Just as I was scratching my head over this, Tim entered through the garage door.

“Did you get it squared away,” he called as he stepped into the tiled kitchen. With every step across the ceramic tile, he squeaked like an injured mouse. My arms fell limp to my sides, and I started to laugh. The problem with the squeak lay in Tim’s choice of leather footwear and nowhere near the substantial framing I was standing on.

Since realizing his faux pas, Tim has taken to wearing boots or sneakers whenever he comes near a job site, and we installers have a bit of fun teasing him about things like squeaky concrete.

—Scott Robinson, Milton, WA

Drawing by: Jim Meehan

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